Wednesday, February 4, 2009

Interview With A Vampire.

Just kidding. Calm down. Dude's still hiding out in London pubs, and can you blame him after all that craziness in November and December? Bless his heart.

My pal, Gina, was interviewed over at her place, by her mother. I loved getting to know even more about Gina and she offered to interview her readers, as well. I really hate talking about myself (snort!), but I took one for the team and agreed to play along.

I'm going to pretend that Gina is a famous talk show host. Like the straight, uber-conservative version of Ellen. (I love Ellen. I love Gina. Go with me here...) And I'm sitting across from her on a big, squishy chair, in a studio lit by television experts, so that the light softens my wrinkles and highlights my hair just so. Both Gina and I are wearing garments by Chanel, jewelry by Van Cleef & Arpels, and heels by Christian Louboutin. (Yes, we are smokin' hot.) The audience is wildly applauding, heartily laughing, and even sighing at key moments while Gina and I chat away like the old friends that we are. (Hey, we met last Spring--that's a long time in blog terms, you know?)

I've now set the stage. Gina and I have had our kissy-kissy moment and we are ready to get down to business:

Lula, it's so great having you here! (Oh, I'm so thrilled, Gina!) Since our time is brief let's jump in and get started. What is your favorite comfort food and your strongest memory tied to it?

Gina, no self-respecting southern girl will say anything other than cheese grits, homemade fried okra, and cast iron skillet-baked corn bread. Throw in a few pounds of freshly steamed crab legs and a pitcher of sweet tea and you have my dream meal. Comfort food at its finest! I have no particular memory attached to these dishes. I just love southern cooking and good seafood.

Now Lula, I know you are the mother of two girls. (Yes--hi Libbey, hi Caroline! Kisses!) All mothers have "bad mom days," of course, so how do you escape when faced with a case of the mommy grumps?

Wow...that's a great question! When I have days where I feel as if I'm the worst mother in the world, I tend to phone a friend for some girl talk. Or cry. Or play really loud, really angsty music. But I honestly find that the best escape is a simple prayer to my Father: "Lord, HELP!" Followed by a very long, very hot bubble bath.

Let's get serious for a moment...if you had one do-over in your life, what would it be?

Only one? I'd love to have several. But since I've learned--the hard way--from all the trials and mistakes of my 34 years, I have to say I'm thankful for God's preservation. However if I did get one do-over I would choose to have continued in my formal dance training. I gave it up for cheerleading, because I was a young teen and popularity was of my utmost concern. Had I stuck with dance I could have been the next Ann Reinking, which was my dream.

You could have been her protege! Moving on...we are in a sad economy right now, but if money were no object, how would you enrich your life, Lula?

It's fun to dream, isn't it? My life, as well as my family's, would be incredibly enriched by owning a pink beach house on Hilton Head Island, South Carolina. I'd also love to have a plane so that I could fly my friends to said beach house on a moment's notice. Of course you (and your sister and mother) are invited at any time!

Well, all our children would certainly love that, but we'd need a few "Moms Only" weeks, too! (Amen!) We're running out of time (audience groans), but I do have one final question for you: We all have things that we dislike, even hate, about ourselves. What is the thing that you love best about yourself?

Should I go with the vain answer or the humble one? How 'bout both? I love my boobs. I'm being totally honest here. They are still pretty decent in appearance, even after breastfeeding two children for 12 months apiece. And nursing was both the hardest and the best thing I've ever done in my life. I'm thankful to have had that experience, so I'm grateful for my boobs. I know I should be a proper lady and use the term "breasts," but I hate that word. Please forgive me, y'all. You know I'm a bit of a rebel at times.

Thanks for letting me interview you, Lula...hasn't this been fun? (The crowd goes wild.) My next guest is the star of the upcoming film, Crank 2...the amazing Jason Statham! Lula, you're invited to stick around, of course.

Lula faints.
And scene.

There you have it, y'all! My very first interview. Thanks, Gina...this was bunches o' fun. Are you ready to kill me yet?

Now...I would love to interview you and you and you. So here is what you do:
1. Leave me a comment saying, "Interview me."
2. I will respond by emailing you five questions. (I get to pick the questions).
3. You will update your blog with the answers to the questions.
4. You will include this explanation and an offer to interview someone else in the same post.
5. When others comment asking to be interviewed, you will ask them five questions.
So come on--let's get to know each other better. And do not fear potential questions--I promise to play very nice. Good times!

*p.s. Gina--I had no idea we picked the exact same title for our interview posts until I went to link you. Great minds, huh? We are so fab, you convert, you.


greedygrace said...

I'll play! "Interview me!"

Great interview!

Swirl Girl said...

Do me baby!

ps- you had me at Ann Reinking...

Anonymous said...

Interview ME! I love this. HOW FUN!

BTW, boobs is a much better word. ; )

Mama Kat said...

Your boobs are my favorite part as well.

Jenny and the Princess Peonies said...

I'm up for an interview.

I wish I loved my boobs.

Elena said...

Lula, you are so funny! When I saw that you were the other recipient of Gina's interview question, I knew right away we were in for some great answers.

Julie said...

that was fun to read and I loved reading Gina's and her mom's too. I might be up for an interview... :)

Gramma 2 Many said...

Great interview and great answers.
Boobs, Tatas, Girls, what ever you call them, if they are still there, flaunt them!! I used to think they were my best asset too:)Now, I rely on my sparkling personality.
Thanks for the shout out too.

Amy said...

Lula! You're famous! I loved your interview! Youare a great guest, so honest and funny. Ellen/Gina was lucky to get you on! I like this game.

a Tonggu Momma said...

It depends on the questions...

And I used to live a hop, skip and a jump from Hilton Head Island (I'm a Beaufort girl).

Heather said...

I know and love all of this about you. It's truly why you and I will be old ladies on the beach together.

Kori said...

Ok sister. I'm in. Bring it on in all your "Hey she looks like Michelle Obama" ness.

I beg... be gentle.

Love ya.

Bekah said...

i want you to interview ME.. for the regular blog, of course, unless you have something hilarious we could come up with for the fun blog(s).

no rush... you have a bunch of wonderful gals ahead of me

loved this.

loved that pic (omg loved it so much.. i'm gonna go look at it again... and again.. and again..)

loved how you ended with jason

love that you love your boobs


CaraBee said...

I still kick myself for dropping out of dance, too. Sadly, my career ended after one class when I was 4. I fully plan to be a crazy dance mom with my daughter. She'll be begging to quit and I'll be like, "NO WAY, JOSEPHINA! You're living out my dreams, dangit!"

Robin said...

Sounds like fun. Interview me, please.

Love the Rob picture, of course. And Lost tonight! squeal!!!!!

Angie's Spot said...

OMG, I just transported back 25 years with that Annie video! My oldest was glued to the screen as well as I cried with joy. They just don't make movies like that anymore. Sigh.

Oh, and interview me please ma'am!! Since you have been inundated with requests, I can be patient. :-)

Brandy said...

I played along last week with Mariah. It was a blast!

Boobs = good answer

Jen said...

this was great! I am an open book, interview me!

Carrie said...

Oh man! I wanted to be the next Aileen Quinn SO badly when that movie came out!

But Ann Reinking sure is gorgeous, isn't she?? My favorite role of hers was in Micki & Maude. What is there NOT to love about that movie? Dudley Moore, her, AND Amy Irving??? GENIUS FOLKS! SHEER GENIUS!!! " )

And I am having a serious case of the bloggity blaaaaaaaaah's, so PLEASE bring on the interview!!!

Carrie said...

By the way, I always hoped my pregnancy would be just like hers in that movie. I'd be on strict bedrest cutting out pictures in magazines!!

Gina said...

Only Lula. Only Lula would imagine me as a famous uber-conservative Ellen. And make me even funnier than I actually am.
Thanks for playing along, Lula. Fame looks good on me.

Jennifer P. said...

Hey--interview me! Can you be Craig Fergeson and speak with a Scotish accent though, I'm just sayin' :)

Jenni Jiggety said...

Breasts are on a chicken! I have boobs, too!

Great interview!

Heather said...

Girl, you do have great boobs. I'm just sayin'.

I'm a little nervous, but I'll do it. Interview me.

Loved talking to you today. Not once, but twice. You brightened my afternoon.

Did you write that letter?

Anonymous said...

OH EM GEE... grace farrell... she was a dreamboat and that clip is my FAVORITE part of annie... i loved her shoes and when they do that reverse move on the chaise. GOD. now i gotta go home and watch it.

someday you can interview me

Anonymous said...

OOOOH! Pick me! Pick me!

Mama Dawg said...

I've been interviewed 3 or 4 times for this, so I won't say pick me this time.

Although it would be a blast!

Awesome interview.

Live.Love.Eat said...

Great interview my friend!!!! I love hearing another lady say they love their boobs. That's pretty much the one thing I still love about myself too. well, it seems you have a lot of participants, I imagine you will ask the same questions to everyone? If not, you have a lot of work ahead of you. But I will play since it's you!!!!!!

Eudea-Mamia said...

At least you didn't call them titties...

Or melons...

Or knockers.

Sorry, I'll send my 12-year-old boy self back to time out now.

(I got tagged by Jill Jill Bo Bill last week. She made me cry. I'm not brave enough to try this again :-)

P.S. thanks for posting the Tuesday button!!

angie said...

Crap. I'm totally too late. I really wanted to be interveiwed by you.

Great one, by the way.

I'm jealous. My "breasts" are in a poor state. A poor state indeed.

Becky said...

Loved your interview! It was waayy better than any "Ellen" I have ever seen!

I will play!!! "Interview Me!"

(And girl! I didn't know you could dance!!! Boobs and moves! H. O. T. )

John Deere Mom said...

I had a parent ask about the appropriateness of the 2nd-4th Edward and Bella books. I only read the first one. I know...shoot me. But I told the parent I knew just who to ask. So...can a mature 11 year old girl handle them?

Carrie said...

Interview me!
I love this idea!