Monday, June 8, 2009

And Now I'm Wondering What Cain Looked Like...

Throughout the history of the world it seems the bad dudes have held a mysterious sway over the girls. And by "history," I mean mine. And by "mine," I mean I've always had a thing for bad boys. Starting with this one:
Seriously...Blaine is a "major appliance, not a name."  But Steff...oh, Steff...he was my Pretty In Pink crush, baby.  Full-on.   Even though I was twelve years old at the time, I knew it then. Andrew McCarthy was a cutie pie.  But James Spader?  Um...yeah...major pre-teen swooning. Steff smoked...Steff did drugs and had wild parties and wrecked his old man's house.  I. Loved. Him.  Much to my mother's chagrin, of course.



A few years later I had a thing for the vamps in The Lost Boys.  But not as big as the thing I have for this particular vamp, whose name is not Edward Cullen.  Oh puh-lease...Eric could take Edward.  Anyday.  At Fangtasia.  Or in Bon Temps, Louisiana.
Hi there, Alexander Skarsgard, also known as Eric Northman.  Yes, you are delicious, and yes, I am so glad True Blood returns in a few days.  Because I love you.  That is all.


Oh, and let's not forget the ultimate badass, stranded on an island with the rest of the survivors of Oceanic 815.  I feel in love with James "Sawyer" Ford the instant he swaggered out of the jungle and snidely remarked to Kate, "I'm a complicated guy, sweetheart..."
Yes you are, my dear.  Yes you are.  And while his character has changed over the past 5 seasons of the best show to ever float across the airwaves,to me he will forever remain that snarky redneck who wasn't afraid to pull out his gun and use it.  (That's what she said.)  Ahem.


And...he needs no explanation.
He'll kick your boo-tay.  And I love him.  Amen.

So how does one parlay her love of the bad boys into a passionate marriage to this man:

He couldn't be farther from a bad boy. I mean, look at him...slaving away over doctor-type stuff, pen behind his ear, wearing khakis, sporting a 'do that elicits "What branch of the military are you in?" queries from total strangers.  

If there was a contest for Mr. Straight-Laced USA*, Scott Litton would be crowned the King, hands down.  The dude doesn't even walk around with an untucked t-shirt, nor would he dream of wearing unpressed khakis.  Or jeans.  Kid you not.

And I'm a sassy kind of girl...I have a tattoo (Mr. Straight-Laced USA eschews the permanent inking), I wear black nail polish (Mr. Straight-Laced USA calls it "punk!"), and sometimes a 24 year old stud tries to mack on me at a Kings of Leon concert.  Seriously, it happened.  Couldn't believe it myself!


Then there's this friend...
Say hello to Heather!  Yes, that Heather...from SITS and Mindless Junque, of course.  She's one of my sassiest friends, for sure.  She has the ink...and she favors black polish, too.  Sometimes her hair has bright red streaks in it.  She rocks Hello Kitty like no other, I tell you.  And, just as I dig the bad dudes, so does sweet Heather.  Which is kind of funny, because she really is sweet (much sweeter than I could ever be) and her agreeing with me that James Spader was THE hottest thing in Pretty In Pink is kinda like hearing a three year old say a cuss word.  It's shocking...hysterical...and totally catches you off guard.

Because this is Heather's man...dear PB...super stud, super genius, and second runner up to Mr. Straight-Laced USA*:

Do we love a man who plays Xbox live with such fervent intent while surrounded by his twin daughters, one of whom has a face covered in something I'm assuming was really delicious?  Of course we do.  Because this man, like my man, is the real deal.  No doubt.

So while I'll continue to enjoy the bad boys, let it be known both far and wide that I'm happily married to the biggest nerd in the world.  And when I say "nerd," I mean it with all the love in my heart.  Because a hot "geek" trumps a badass dude any day.  Especially when, while in Target last night, that hot geek tells his youngest daughter, "Here--hold Daddy's hand so that I don't get lost."

It made me fall in love with him all over again.  Yeah, I'm a sap.  Yeah, I married a hot geek. Yeah, we're total opposites, but also exactly the same.  I wouldn't have it any other way.  


*Straight-laced as in appearance...but we all know appearances are not always what they seem to be, and this is why I'll keep the best of Scott and PB a mystery.  It adds a bit of badass-ness to their mystique.  (And just about now, PB is ready to kill me.  Save it for Vegas, dude.)

47 comments:

Linda said...

Ah ... Steff ... I have fond memories our love affair. But it wasn't meant to last ... thankfully ... and I ended up marrying one cuter than Blane and just as sweet and devoted as Duckie. I think I totally won on that deal!

And you totally got me with the "hold daddy's hand ..." line.

... sweetest thing ever!

Casey said...

"Lost" really is one the the greatest shows ever and Sawyer is one of the sexiest guys around. Who knew a scruffy face and dirty shaggy hair could be so appealing?

Denise said...

First, you've got all those other guys Lulu, just let me have Sawyer. Pleaaase???

My husband was a total straight laced nerd too (Mr. Biochemistry PhD and then an MD) He was totally into classical music and bluegrass music and I'm into POD, Muse, Paramour etc. But we worked as you and Scott do. Rock on.

gypsygirlsjourney said...

This is the coolest, most heart melting blog ever! I am also married to Mr. Straitlace...the hero of my heart, the knight in shining armour...who indulges his wife's insanity for the baaaad boys (Alexander as Eric. and, as himself. YYY! Have you read the books? You might ) and a crazy passion for rockin' music with a smile that says he knows my heart belongs to him. Bad Boy Dreams and the sweetest of *true love* to you and your honey, my kindred spirit! xoxoCheri

gypsygirlsjourney said...

...the rest of the sentence: "You might...need a fire extinguisher for the parts with Sookie and Eric...particularly book 4!" You. Rock. SiStar! xoxoCheri

Amy said...

That is so sweet.
You know me. I'm a bad boy girl all the way. Kid Rock, Johnny Depp, yum yum yum.

Sissy said...

Can totally agree with you, although I may not be as wild as you and Heather, I am certainly wilder than my church-employed husband, who works on a computer all day and tucks his t-shirts in too. Love that geek, though!

Caroline said...

I too am married to a good guy. I guess this just says that while bad boys are tempting and yummy for a while, we'd rather settle down with a good guy who will treat us like queens. Amen.

Mr. Baseball's idea of wild is rearranging the landscaping in front of our house. I think yesterday's new configuration was the 20th time. Seriously. He's a wild one.

Heather said...

Yeah, bad guys are fun to look at and lust over in a distant way, but being married to a hard-workin' all American kinda guy is what it's all about.

I love how much you love Scotty, and he, you. You make an awesome couple, in all your opposite-ness. And if that wasn't a word before, it is now.

Have Scott and PB met before? I'm sure they will hit it off in Vegas, while you and Heather are SITSing it up by the pool. Or at the slots...wherever. Wish we could join you; maybe next year.

Nancy Face said...

I'm so boring...I've always loved the good guys! Pretty in Pink was my favorite movie way back when, and I adored cutie pie Andrew McCarthy, haha! :D

I love the picture of your "hot geek" with the girls! So cute! :)

Shelley said...

Yeah, Jason Padric in the Lost Boys, oh my.
I'm in love with your geek too for saying what he did in Target. It's okay. I'm not a stalker.
And it's okay that you're spicy and he's appears to be straight laced. Opposites attract and keep the life interesting. You guys totally rock it.

sassy stephanie said...

Love it. This describes my hubs and myself. I, duh, am a sassy wild one. My hubs is way more conservative, but the funny thing is, when he was a teen, he was the wild one. Now, he tells me he 'outgrew it'.

Brandy said...

I don't think I would ever define Stevie as "straight laced" but we too differ in a lot of ways. It's true what they say about opposites...

And sweet nothings in Target always touch me in my special place.

But not like what you're thinking.

Perv.

Fidgeting Gidget said...

Oh how I miss Target...I have to move back to the US...these Canucks don't know what they're missing without the cute clothes and dollar bins.

And Sawyer is my ultimate bad boy too...and I'm married to a scrawny little guy, but I love him anyway.

Gina said...

See, you're in luck. No worrys about me steeling any of your badass boys. You may have to hide PB and Dr. Litton if I'm around though...
I married a sweet man with a wild adventure streak- and that is why 2 of my 5 kids already know how to paddle the white water raft. And why 5 of them know how to rock climb.

Heather said...

You know, we chose the conservative types because we both know (from experience...*ahem*) that the bad boy types carry soooooo many issues.

And, yeah, the oppositeness keeps things nice and spicey.

Nothing hotter than a good man in a buzz cut and a tucked in shirt. It makes me want to be sooooo bad.

Kat said...

Hmmm...I happen to have a man with a buzz cut and tucked in t-shirts. And wild is so not part of his vocab. And we are complete and total opposites. It makes life more interesting.

Jen said...

I couldn't agree with you more. This was such a cool post. I dated a few bad boys in high school and college. I always thought that I wanted one. But you can't keep the bad boys sure they are fun and exciting but some one always gets hurt (me, I always got hurt). So like you I will take my geeky nerd over a bad boy any day. And you know, those geeks just ooze sexiness in there own way. ;)

P.S. Want to help me get inked in Vegas? I want a tattoo for my 30th birthday which is happening in while we are in Vegas. I need help.

Bekah said...

i heart your nerd. i heart this post. i heart bad boys. but alas my heart will always have a soft spot for the nerds

Katie said...

Well, I'm not married, but I'd love to find a nice Prince-in-Strait-Laced-Armor to settle down with. :)

You had me gushing over what your dearest said at Target...that wins at life, hands down.

<3,
Katie

Nicole said...

Your so funny! Maybe some day he will get a bad boy streak?! Either way you got yourself a good man.
I love the bad boys too, and my hubby is a police man with full sleeve tattoo's. I love it! Good boy that looks like a bad boy. I can deal with it.

CaraBee said...

I always, ALWAYS, thought why didn't she go for Steff. He's cute, got a great car and clearly digs her. So what if he's kind of a masochist. That attitude probably explains the long line of broken hearts from all the bad boys I tried to tame. Damn, when it was good, it was GOOD, though.

None of those guys hold a candle to my mister, though. I'm perfectly happy with my World of Warcraft playing, buzzcut having, shirt tucked into a swimsuit(YES!) husband.

CaraBee said...

PS - "Hold daddy's hand so he won't get lost" just might be the sweetest, cutest thing I have ever heard. Truly.

ParentingPink said...

Oh, we are so much alike! I LOVED bad boys growing up - except mine was Kiefer in Lost Boys - heck, it still is (augh - 24!). And my hubby is also a "Mr. Straight Laced" type of fellow. But you know what? I wouldn't have it any other way - and neither would you :-)

Btw, I don't have any ink, but I do sport black and "sassy blue" nail polish. Hmmmm- maybe in 3 years when I turn 40 I'll get the guts for some ink! Hubby would die for sure! LOL

Swirl Girl said...

It's always the straigh laced ones you gotta watch out for...

...as they have been known to have wild animal instints they keep under wraps!

Sun said...

too, too funny. love this post.. bc it's so true..
and as *straight laced as scotty is. . . he is sorda not.
but, of course i know your stories :) hee hee.

x

Ric Blazi said...

Girl you are crazy!!

Melissa said...

Oh my. You know my love for "The Practice" that birthed our incredible Ben Linus. It also rebirthed none other than the "once known as Steff", James Spader.....incredible actor and his very dry tone is so sexy.

Good boys are where it's at. I don't think they come more straight laced than my husband. I was soooooo attracted to the bad boys, but while they are sexy and desirable in the beginning, their antics probably get a little old when it's time to change diapers and put the kids to bed. They're on to the next hot thing. Know what I'm sayin'? My man is good and he is hawt, too. Whole package and he'll stay around to bake for me....:)

Tony C said...

These are the post that keep me coming back and staying a true Lula fan.

More guys need to educate here...in Lulaville...it's good stuff.

Abby said...

This gave me goosebumps! I too am married to a straight-laced man, who at this very moment- 8:41pm- is asleep in bed next to me because he gets up at 5am, sometimes earlier, to go to work. He gets a marine style haircut about every 4 weeks. I can't say I ever loved the bad boys (or should I say "boyz") though :)

The Bayou Belles and Their Beau said...

Yeah ... James Spader ... the hottest, for sure. Gosh, the husbands look like brothers. Good, nerdy boys like hot, bad girls. That's just the way it is. And, hot girls with brains love them back.

Veggie Mom said...

I'd go for James Spader any day. He's one hot hottie, ain't he? My Hubz is a pretty straight arrow himself. I'd like to try walking on the wild side at least once in my life!

Dancing Phalanges said...

On this side of the computer room, you have Me (Kerith... TheRightWife, now known as Dancing Phalanges, lol) rockin' the black polish, blaring Muse and Pantera, tatted and pierced up --- looking pretty "punk" as your fella would put it. But as far as my type goes? Oh, I love me a tall, pale, thin nerd! Not only did I marry one, but I carry a torch for Matthew Gray Gubler (Dr. Reed from Criminal Minds). I thought Blane was cute, not Steff. BUT - I really thought James Spader was super hot in The Secretary ;)

Amy said...

I fell for a straight - laced, pressed shirt and pants, never untucked shirts, Nerd too! I love him so very much.

imogenci said...

James...Jason...
I'm -almost- salivating, here :P

Ingenious of you to have settled down with one of the "good" guys, though. They're just so sweet and dependable ;)

Here's to many more blissful, nerd-y years for you guys!

imogenci said...

Ps. There's a blog award for you, over at my place. Come collect anytime :)

Em said...

Sweetness. All of it.

The things I will teach my boys - the good girls think they want the bad boys, but always end up with the geeks in the end.

At least the smart ones do.

Mine is a financial nerd. That's HAWT!

(I almost swooned in the theatre the other day - Jason Patric plays the Dad in "My Sister's Keeper" - difficult material for sure, but he'll help me though it ;-)

Jenny and the Princess Peonies said...

Um...all of them HOTT. I too married a nerd. But that is only because we are smart women who know that the bad boy has issues and may leave us and not provide for us in "real" life.

And Jace would totally kick Edwards boo tay. Now He is HOTT. Bad attitude and everything....mmmmm

They must make Mortal Instruments into movies. They will right? I'm sure they will...They better. Just as long as Catherine doesn't get her hands on it.

Kari said...

Over from SITs saying hello!

I love this post! I totally had the hots for James Spader in Pretty in Pink. I know what you mean about lovin' the bad boys, LOL! Sounds like you have a great guy and what a cute family!

Christina said...

It seems we have a strange likeness in our man-candy.. I though Jason was the only one we have in common. I have a lust for bad boys too... and the TB vamp. (so excited for the return)

Enjoy your straight-laced man. They do make great partners. At least we are smart enough to know that about those bad boys!

Reading Mom said...

It boils down to our mothering insticts.

We breed with Mr. Straight and Narrow because we know that Mr. Bad Ass may be great for hot and heavy stuff but may not stick around long enough to help us with all the heavy lifting of raising wonderful kids. The nice guy will be a partner and a stable father; the bad ass is more likely to flit off somewhere else and leave us holding the bag.

That's my take on it, and I'm sticking with it.

Infarrantly Creative said...

Hilarious...yep the two of you couldn't be more different...love me some Dr. Litton...he's the best for u!

Marrdy said...

Sorry, but I am so totally into Blaine..

And I can't believe PB would ever do you any harm. From what I can see he's just a big Kitty Kat!!

Shannon said...

I guess I'm not as badass as you are... 'cause I totally went for Blaine. Give me the sensitive cute one any day...

themoonisdown said...

geeks will ALWAYS win!! in my book especially

ps you SO have a type! ;D

angie said...

He has GOT to be totally flattered right about now. Especially the last part. he he.

I would tell you that I think he's really handsome and a real catch, but when I meet him in October I don't want him thinking when he meets me, "is that one of the chicks that thinks Lula has incredible taste and married a handsome nerd?"

No thank you. I'd much rather him think, "I'm glad they wear nametags b/c I'd never remember all these names otherwise". :)

I HOPE everyone will be wearing a nametag.

LenaLoo said...

Good to know that the good guys finish first sometimes ;) And I am married to a hawt geek too :)