Delicious Slices of Heaven.

There are some bites so perfectly pleasurable I just want to tuck into a warm bed with a plateful and nosh the night away. I want to indulge without making a mess in my QVC Northern Nights 400 threadcount sateens, acquring heartburn, or adding excess flab. I do believe fresh, hot, glazed Krispy Kremes will be available for daily consumption in Heaven and that new body I'm promised (thanks, Lord!) won't gain an ounce! A DREAM COME TRUE!

Right up there with the delectable glazed beauties would be fried green tomatoes, or as I lovingly refer to them, delicious slices of Heaven on earth. I would be remiss in my Georgian Belle Claim to Glory if I didn't share the wonder that is this southern specialty. We dwellers below the Mason-Dixon line are famous for taking a perfectly healthy vegetable (or fruit--whichever you deem a tomato, and I won't object either way) and dunking it into hot oil, destroying any chance of retaining any semblence of nutrients. But boy--does it make for a delicious party in your mouth. Someone start singing praises now. (That would have to be YOU, Melissa Lee.)

Because I love y'all so much I just have to share this recipe with you. Again, when have I ever steered you wrong? It's not all tampons and baby powder, folks!

Oh, I should preface this by stating I have no recipe...I have no precise amounts or such as that...just follow along, look at the pictures, and we'll all be as gleeful as Dick and Jane. It's super easy, I promise!

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Lula's Fried Green 'Maters ('cause that's what true southerners call 'em.)

3 or 4 Fresh Green Tomatoes, washed and dried
Some flour (I don't know--maybe 3/4 cup)
Some cornmeal (again--I don't measure--so go with 3/4 cup)
Salt
Pepper
Vegetable oil for fying

To begin, get your heaviest & largest skillet and pour in about a half inch of oil. Begin heating the oil on medium to medium high heat. And kiss those green orbs. Seriously. They are about to make you a very happy individual.

Slice tomatoes about 1/4 inch thick. Some folks say 1/2 inch, but I prefer mine to be a little thinner. That's just me, though--you do whatever makes you happy. Then, and this is key, place slices on paper towels (Mrs. R--you think I'm gonna use my good Vivas for this? Oh no--leftover beach cheapies, baby!) and sprinkle them with a little salt. This allows the tomatoes to drain a bit, so they're not soggy and mushy for the frying.


While the tomatoes are draining (5-10 minutes), combine the flour and cornmeal in a shallow dish or bowl. Add salt and pepper to taste and mix well. Once the tomatoes are ready, dredge each slice in the flour and cornmeal mixture, coating both sides well.


After coating all the slices in their fluffy robe of off-white, fry a "test" tomato to make sure the oil is ready--not too hot, not too cool. Once you're certain the oil is doing its job (and you'll know right off, of course!) add in as many slices as your pan will hold, without overcrowding. Brown on both sides, or brown each side twice if you like 'em very crispy. I'll eat 'em any way, shape or form, if you wanna know the truth of the matter!


Once they've gone from pasty to golden brown (much like a teenager preparing for Spring Break), drain the slices on paper towels and allow to cool just a bit before serving. Ahhhhhhhhh...delicious slices of Heaven on earth. Oh, but yes they are. ENJOY!Adorable child not included--she's already promised to Mrs. R's son.

After making these today I pretty much stood at my kitchen island and ate every single one. (I totally offered to share, too--but Kim and Libbey weren't interested. SUCKERS--more for me!) I don't mind owning up to my fried 'mater gluttony. There's zero shame in my love of these delicious slices of Heaven. If I'm serving them with a meal they are a fabulous appetizer alongside cheese grits, and perfect with a green salad, instead of boring ol' bread. But that's when I'm gettin' my Paula on. (You know Paula--my close, personal friend.) Usually we just stand at the island, devouring until we're sick with fullness. Sick, but happy.

Again, someone needs to start singing praise. Melissa, step up to the plate (bring the Julio's, please) and give God the glory. Great things He hath done. Amen.