Wednesday, June 4, 2008

It's 1/2 Full, Said the Optimist.

Do y'all love the Disney cartoon Alice in Wonderland? I totally dig it...a singing walrus, a hookah pipe-smoking catepillar, playing cards painting the roses red, and the eerily exciting Tulgey Wood. What's not to love? One of the more famed scenes from this adaptation of Lewis Caroll's original story is the unbirthday party thrown by the Mad Hatter, the March Hare and the Dormouse.

Today is my unbirthday, to be precise (and Alice was always precise!), but it is also a day of minor significance. June 4 is my 1/2 birthday. 33.5 cheers for Lula, please! I did say it was a minor day, peeps.

While driving home from Libbey's dance recital dress rehearsal (say that one 3 times fast) I starting thinking about Debbie and how she blogs constantly, in her mind, all day long. Thoughts on blogging seem to come to me most often while driving the MomVan. And thus my latest post--some of the "half" stuff in my life:

*All those half-read books piled on hearth of our bedroom fireplace. As a lover of the printed word and always wanting to know how the story ends, I never leave a book unfinished, even if it turns out to be a not-so-great read. But since discovering the wonder that is great Sci-Fi television, also known as Battlestar Galactica, I have used every minute of spare time (read: when my girls are in bed) to watch an episode or two before calling it a night. And this is why I haven't finished The Host yet. (Love you, Tiffany.) Even though I've promised it to Kat. I have started and paused about 5 novels in the past month. I'll get to them. Just as soon as I finsh Season 3 of Galactica.

*Speaking of books, to be fair and to help me feel better about my very rare and recent bout of lack o' reading, I am saving half a dozen "beach reads" for our trip to Myrtle Beach in a couple of weeks. My most favorite not-at-all guilty pleasure in the entire world is to plop my beach chair down in the surf and read for hours upon hours at a time. Half the time I don't get to do this--being the mother of small children and all--or rather, I don't get to do it as long as I'd like. God has blessed me, though, with an older child happily occupied by her father and uncle in the pool, while the younger naps her regular 3-hour stretch (God is good). During these golden hours last summer, I could be found on the beach in Hilton Head Island, SC, chair sinking in the sand, head covered by a fabulously wide-brimmed hat, reading the entire Twilight series in less than a week. Perfection! If I get to do this even half the time we're in Myrtle Beach I'll be a happy gal...and I'll be devouring all these books I've saved.

*I have a growing pile of socks without mates. (There's a mysterious force living inside my washer that eats socks. For real!) I'm certain these socks won't intermingle and mate with other loners, thereby producing the perfect match to complete the pair. Therefore I am stuck with all these half pairs of socks. Or is there such a thing as a "half pair?" Oh, I can't even go head's still recovering from almost-pneumonia.

*When it comes to tunes, I have MADD. That's Musical Attention Defecit Disorder. Yeah, I made it up. Stick with me here, y'all. I just checked my iTunes account and as of now there are 5623 songs in this virtual jukebox that is cleverly disguised as my Miss Pretty Pink laptop. I have playlists for working out, fine dining, favorite songs of praise, 80's hair bands, and yes,"mood music." Even though I hand-pick each song I can never make it through even half a playlist without skipping, stopping and/or starting over with something new. A while back though, while making my blog rounds and cooking supper, I realized there are a few albums on iTunes that I'll enjoy from start to finish, each and every time. The soundtracks to "The Last Kiss" and "Gardenstate." (Zach Braff--I adore you!) A Pottery Barn compilation entitled "RSVP," full of jazz and smooth classics. Coldplay's "A Rush of Blood to the Head." Simon & Garfunkel's Greatest Hits. And "The Purest Place" by Watermark--the most brilliant offering of praise ever put to music, I'm convinced. (Listening to it even now..."Be blessed, be loved, be lifted high, be treasured here, be glorified...I owe my life to You, oh Lord..." They're singing my life here.) None of these albums can be done halfway, I'm telling you.

*Because I'm a make-up/smelly goods whore, I have half full bottles and pots and tubes and jars of varying creams, lotions, potions and colors guaranteed to make this pasty face & body over. My true struggle is with smelly goods of the body cream type. Like a fickle child with an abundance of birthday money in FAO Schwartz, I can't make up my mind! Lately Ginger-Mint has been showing the love (read post below), but there's always my fallback choice, Nivea. Or do I want to use that new Dove creamy body oil-type stuff I found at Target last month? And there sits the 4 tubes of heavily-scented creams of the Bath & Body Works variety, given as birthday (the real one, not the un or 1/2 one!) and Christmas gifts last December. To quote Natalie Sands, in one of the greatest films of all time, Girls Just Want To Have Fun, "Decisions are the worst!" If any of y'all are in the southwesternest (is that even a word?) corner of Virgina, come on by for some free smelly goods...half-used. I have plenty to share. If you just want half, that is.

*At any given time of any given day in any given room of this house you will find half-filled water bottles. Yes, I buy water--the Sam's Choice kind, aka cheap--because we drink it constantly and are more apt to reach for H2O instead of a Coke, especially when it's presented chilled and in its very own container. For some reason none of us have ascertained, we never seem to finish an entire bottle. And since I'm paying precious gas money for a mostly free element, I preserve each and every drop. There's half a bottle on my nightstand...always. I see one on the coffee table in the living room--that one belongs to my Dad. Oh, Scott's left one on his desk...wait, it's half-filled with dip spit. (Yes--he's a redneck--he chews and spits, y'all.) And here, next to my laptop, is the one from which Libbey drank half while playing video games with Mamaw Pinky. This house is a breeding ground for unfinished bottles of water. Hey...maybe I can put them together with the socks and get something special going. Lemme find my mood music playlist...

I could go on, but half of you are probably already asleep due to my mindless ramblings. This is the way my mind works, people. It's my half birthday. I'll ramble if I want to.

And to my dear husband, who is presently reading over my shoulder, still encouraging me to write "the next great American novel," (um, thanks for the enormous vote of confidence, but unless it's tampons, tingly tooties or endless rambling, I don't have it in me!) I make this vow: I promise to take ALL the antibiotic you prescribed for my almost-pneumonia. The container won't remain half full, as per usual. Physicians the world over are now rejoicing.

Sister love--nothing "half" about it.

*THIS JUST IN: Today, June 5, at 12:30 pm (east coast time), our newest family member will be making her appearance. My sister-in-law is being prepped for surgery now, to deliver her 2nd daughter. We are so stinkin' excited. Being in this house is like the frenzy of mating meerkats at the zoo, I tell y'all. In a few hours there will be FOUR Litton grandgirls. And then the fun really begins. But the one thing that bothers me about baby Helen arriving today is that it's now June 5. Not June 4th. Not my 1/2 birthday. Like the good Aunt Lula I am, I will hold this over the child's head until I'm old and feeble. She will never live it down. Poor thing...just over an hour from being born and she already has a a burden to carry. World's Best Aunt--that's ME! Pictures will be posted later this evening, so check back & let me brag on her, please.


Amy said...

Happy Half Birthday. I always celebrate mine as it is December 24th, Christmas eve. I always loved getting presents twice a year with exact distance between.
Also, I like the term you have coined for i tunes. I have the same problem. I am a self professed I tunes junkie. Nothing like a good list for every occasion.

Kat said...

We do the half water bottles thing here, too. They are everywhere. Even with the girlies at camp...I am still finding them. And I love the idea of intermingling my half pairs of socks with my half bottles of water. Something magical might come from that blessed union. Or I just might have to put my orphan socks back in the dryer because they're wet.

And let's see when you finish "The Host." I'm number 96 now on the wait list :-)

Carrie said...

Eighties Hair Bands! Last Father's Day I bought David "Twenty Years of Poison" or something like that, their greatest hits.

Proudest moment in parenting history: My five year old knowing all the words to "Talk Dirty To Me" ...

'Cuz baby we'll be
At the drive-in
In the old man's Ford
Behind the bushes
'Til Im screamin' for more
Down the basement
Lock the cellar door
And baby
Talk dirty to me

David said instead of a college fund, we might as well invest in the Twirler 3000 Stripping Pole because that's where she's headed.

insane mama said...

Happy half birthday my friend!
and happy new neice
and happy halfs or everthing
and I can't say dance recital dress rehearsal.. not even once!
and Yes, I'm serious about the court thing, she thinks our house is "unsafe" due to my ramblings and his....

Mrs. Romero said...

I have half a mind to come on over there and share half a bottle...

Congrats on a new delicious baby to love on!

Kim said...

I'm so jealous of that new baby in your family! All our "babies" are grown up! I guess I will just keep lovin' yours! Cause that is such a chore!

TentCamper said...

All right Lula -
I am completely with you. On the 16th I turn 40.5.
I will apologise ahead of time...I only finished half of your post.

But besides that,I have ....issus with books. I love a good book and there is nothing better that an interesting story. That being said, I don't think I have finished a full book in ...maybe 15 years. I know.. I must be retarded or something. I have this one book, that I LOVE, that I boght last June right before a 2 week vacation. Yeah.... I am about half done with it.
And as for unmatched socks...they drive me so crazy that If I do not throw away the "lonely" ones after 2 "laundry days" I go nts!

Thanks again from an optimistic TentCamper

minijonb said...

happy happy joy joy!

two months ago you had your 33 1/3 birthday, which doesn't mean as much as it used to, but now you can look forward to your 45 rpm birthday.

Carrie said...

Oh come on, 45 rpm! Good one. Remember those little thingies that you would put in the 45 to make it work on an lp record player? What I wouldn't give to have one of those back again.

Debbie said...

I just wrote a comment and it disappeared! Grr. I can relate to just about everything you said...i have half read books laying around because instead of reading, I have been blogging in the evening. Well I guess that is reading. We have those mystery bottles laying around too.What's with that. Oh and the sock gremlins...don't ge me started...maybe we can breed ours together...just a thought. Anyways, have a happy half birthday.

Gina said...

That movie has given me migraines since I was 10- it's possessed. When we went to disney land, our kids BEGGED to get off of that ride. They actually didn't like any of the old movie rides- but I digress. I am half done with everything in life, too. Half baked. That's me.

Heather said...

First and husband chews as well. Spooky.

I have about four books going at once right now. I did manage to finish The Host, but I've got Interview with a Vampire and Dark Lover going. So I guess that's only three. Can you tell I need my vampire fix?

I'm with you on the half used bottles of lotion. I can't finish that kind of stuff before I get tired of the smell.

I do not share your MADD. I have to listen and analyze every song I hear all the way through.

And I can never drink the whole bottle of water either.

Loved this post, girl. Happy half a birthday.

Melissa said...

Whew, made it through the whole post! It was very well written. I concur with your hubby about the novel! I love to read your ramblins'. I feel a kindred spirit. Must be the 33 thing! Just had mine in May. Girls Just Want to Have husband checks out as soon as I turn it on! Helen Hunt is my favorite!